What Do You Want To Know?

Have you ever wondered what it's like to be married to a doctor? Or, have you ever had questions about the medical profession that you were just burning to ask? Then, you've come to the right place. Welcome! My name is Amanda, and I am currently married to a doctor. He's an OB/GYN, and he recently started practicing medicine. I've been with him from the beginning of undergrad all the way through medical school and residency (twelve years of training, to be exact), so I've become very used to the idea of living with a doctor 24/7. I've had several friends ask me what it's like to be married to an OB/GYN, so I decided to start blogging about my experiences. I'd like this to be a Q&A type of blog, so if there is anything you'd like to know, and you've read The Disclaimers* at the bottom of this page, then, ask away! Your questions can be funny or serious or whatever. If you have any amusing anecdotes about your experiences with your own OB/GYN or family physician, let me know. Also, if you're currently married to a doctor, whatever his/her chosen field, please feel free to share your thoughts and life experiences. You might be able to answer someone else's question better than I could! You can leave all your questions or comments in the comment section of each post, follow me at twitter.com (@asktheobswife), or email me at asktheobswife@gmail.com.

I look forward to hearing from each and every one of you!
Amanda, The OB's Wife

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Does Your Life Revolve Around His Work Schedule?

So, do our lives really revolve around my physician spouse's work schedule? Yes, and no. He has a better schedule than residency, in that he only has to be on-call about one day a week. That also means he has at least one day a week he can be home to rest and relax. However, unless he's on an extended vacation (like last week), there isn't much we can do in the evening together, unless we schedule it way in advance and, yes, around his work. I'm happy I joined a great mom's group. It helps my son and I get out of the house each day, and we've discovered some great places and activities in our new city because of it. I feel guilty some days, though, because my husband can't share in these experiences with us. For example, today he was on-call. In fact, he still is on-call and still working hard at the hospital (and it's an hour until midnight). When he finishes his shift tomorrow, he'll most likely want to come home and rest. That makes me a little sad because I organized a great meet-up for my mom's group at a local pizza place, a la Chuck E. Cheese's. Maybe we'll get lucky in the morning and find out he slept some at the hospital, so he'll be more amenable to going with us. However, I have a feeling it'll just be my son and I attending the event this time around. Not only does he miss many of these opportunities to spend time with his family, but there are also several times when I must RSVP "no" to a night out with the girls. I know it's a little selfish of me to feel so disappointed by this, since he equally misses fun, eventful nights out with his guy friends. Still, I have to be honest and admit that, every time a "Mom's Night Out/In" is scheduled on a night when my husband is supposed to be on-call, I kind of get bummed out. I know I could always hire a babysitter, but what if my husband doesn't have to go in to the hospital because of a light work night? I could leave our son at home with him, but you never know when an emergency might pop up or a baby might decide to come into the world. It's just easier to say "no" than it is to plan around such a chaotic routine. One consolation is that my husband gets A LOT of vacation time now, which means we'll get a lot of time to spend with him (away from work). In fact, in a little over a week, he and I will be going to Chicago for five days. It will be a work-related vacation because he'll be spending most of his time at a conference. However, we decided it might be best to leave our son with my parents, which means my husband and I will have our evenings (and some of our day times, depending on his conference schedule) to ourselves. It also means I'll have some time by myself to enjoy the city, at least the areas near our hotel. I'm looking forward to a little spontaneity in my day, instead of the normal scheduled day-to-day routine. Especially after a day like today, when I felt like a single parent when dealing with my crabby 2 1/2-year-old son rather than a married one. I'm just glad tomorrow will be a new day, and my husband will be around at some point to experience it with us!


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Cindy Dy said...

Thank you for this post. Keep it up. Hope to read more post from you guys.


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*The Disclaimers:

1. This will not be a "medical advice" blog, so if you have any questions pertaining to your personal medical situation, please do not ask me. My husband is the physician, not me. I know how to put band-aids and kisses on boo-boos, and that's about the extent of my medical expertise. Also, please do not ask me to take your medical questions to my husband to be answered by him. I just don't believe that's ethically right, especially within this type of forum. Please seek the guidance and care of your own personal physician for any specific medical questions you may have.

2. If your question is in any way personal, I may not answer it. If you ask me anything about parenting or motherhood, especially if it pertains to this blog, I will most likely answer you. However, if you want to know my full name, date of birth, address, phone number, the health of my sex life, etc., I'm not going to give you a reply. For those who are curious, I'm a Cancer, my current favorite color is purple, my favorite number is 7, and my interests include cooking, sewing, reading, assisting in the organization of my local moms' group, spending time with my family and friends, playing board and role-playing games, Twittering, and blogging, of course.

3. If you think words like "vagina" and "breast" are best left for the bathroom and/or bedroom, then this blog is probably NOT for you. I live with a doctor full-time, so the correct medical jargon for body parts is a part of my everyday vocabulary. I am certain, considering my husband's chosen field, that I will be using such words quite often when I answer your questions. Yes, I say "penis" and "breast" around my 2-year-old son. He's bound to hear them someday, and it might as well be from his parents. Also, I personally believe in teaching my children the correct names for their body parts.

That's it! Everything else is fair game! Thanks for sharing and reading!